Chrissy Teigen and John Legend are mourning the loss of their son one month after announcing their pregnancy.
The couple — who are parents to daughter Luna Simone, 4, and son Miles Theodore, 2 — shared the sad news on Wednesday, revealing that her bleeding couldn’t be stopped, “despite bags and bags of blood transfusions.”
“We are shocked and in the kind of deep pain you only hear about, the kind of pain we’ve never felt before. We were never able to stop the bleeding and give our baby the fluids he needed, despite bags and bags of blood transfusions. It just wasn’t enough,” Teigen, 34, wrote in a lengthy and emotional Instagram post.
“We never decide on our babies’ names until the last possible moment after they’re born, just before we leave the hospital,” she continued, sharing some black-and-white photos from the hospital. “But we, for some reason, had started to call this little guy in my belly Jack. So he will always be Jack to us. Jack worked so hard to be a part of our little family, and he will be, forever.”
“To our Jack – I’m so sorry that the first few moments of your life were met with so many complications, that we couldn’t give you the home you needed to survive. We will always love you,” the grieving mom wrote. “Thank you to everyone who has been sending us positive energy, thoughts and prayers. We feel all of your love and truly appreciate you.”
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“We are so grateful for the life we have, for our wonderful babies Luna and Miles, for all the amazing things we’ve been able to experience,” she concluded. “But everyday can’t be full of sunshine. On this darkest of days, we will grieve, we will cry our eyes out. But we will hug and love each other harder and get through it.”
Legend, 41, also shared Teigen’s statement on his own Twitter account, and wrote, “We love you, Jack 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤.”
Following her Instagram post, Teigen tweeted, “Driving home from the hospital with no baby. How can this be real.”
In September, Teigen was put on bed rest and eventually hospitalized due to excessive bleeding from her placenta. She recounted one ″scary morning″ on Sept. 29 after receiving blood transfusions when she experienced a ″huge blood clot.″
Sharing an ultrasound of the child on Sept. 24, Teigen applauded him for ″working so hard,″ writing at the time: ″Hi my sweet strong boy. You are working so hard, I promise it’ll be worth it!!!”
As part of Legend’s “Wild” music video, the parents revealed the surprise pregnancy back in August, with a source telling PEOPLE at the time that Teigen ″never thought it would be possible for Chrissy to get pregnant naturally″ and called the pregnancy a ″miracle.″
Another insider said Teigen — who has been open about how she previously underwent in vitro fertilization to conceive their two children — was ″pretty shocked″ when she found out about the pregnancy.
Opening up about the pregnancy complications that led to her bed rest in September, Teigen said her placenta is ″super weak,″ causing her to bleed, which she said was ″high-risk.″
″It’s always been kind of the bad part of my pregnancies with Luna,″ she said at the time. ″With Miles, it just stopped feeding him. It stopped taking care of him. I was stealing all his food because I was getting huge but he wasn’t getting big at all, so he had to come out early and Luna had to come out early. I was induced both times.”
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Legend previously opened up to PEOPLE that his priority as a husband is being a ″rock″ for Teigen. ″Being a good husband is about communicating and listening to what your partner needs and wants,″ he said in November 2019. ″A lot of it is being trustworthy, being dependable, being someone they can rely on. They want security and to know someone has their back. Hopefully, I do that for Chrissy.”
Legend also explained how becoming parents strengthened the couple’s bond. The two tied the knot in 2013.
″[Parenthood] deepens your love for your partner because you see them in a different light going through, in our case, the trouble of actually having a kid,” he said. “Then Chrissy’s going through postpartum depression. You just see different sides of that person, and if you go through it and you learn from it and you come out the other end better for it, then it deepens and strengthens your relationship.”